Quaker Alphabet Blog 2015-2017 - X for the unknown

X is a kind of question mark, an unknown value in an equation. When writing a blog I find that each post is setting out into the unknown. Even when writing within a structure, like the alphabet, the element of mystery and surprise is still there.

One of the things which keeps me going back to Quaker meetings is this element of the unknown. Although there are structures and procedures which have grown up over the years and give a comforting safety and routine, there is also the unknown which, if we are open to it, has the power to discomfort and change us, leading us on to explore new paths.

Quaker community is like this too - both supportive and challenging. Encountering the unknown is what allows community to grow and deepen - but it is seldom easy. I am someone happy in my own company but I know that I also need to make the effort to be part of a community. X for me is the unknown that allows me to balance these two impulses.

Quaker Alphabet Blog 2014 - Y for Yes

'Yes' was what I said when I started writing Quaker Alphabet blog posts back in 2013. I needed a prompt to keep me writing and the alphabetical discipline has been good for me and has led me into some unexpected subject areas.

In life and among Friends I have often fallen into the trap of saying 'Yes' to too many things. I have been so happy to be asked that I have often taken on too much and have sometimes become overwhelmed and failed to fulfill my obligations.

For a long time my remedy for this condition was to learn to say 'No', to pause for thought before I made any commitment and to look honestly at what I could manage and at the direction I felt my Inward Guide to be pushing me in.

So far, so good. But now I am looking at the whole question again in a different way. In a new place and learning to fit in to a new community I began by holding back, not wanting to appear to push myself forward. Opportunities arose and I began saying 'Yes' again but, more importantly, I have decided to go forward in a positive way. From now on I will look for the 'Yes' I can say, however small that 'Yes' may be, and stop worrying about saying 'No' sometimes.

Quaker Alphabet Blog 2014 - V for Variety

How much variety (or diversity) is there among Quakers in the UK and worldwide, and is it a good thing? This is one of the questions being discussed at the moment on the Facebook group Quaker Renewal UK in a very wide-ranging and (on the whole) good-tempered way.

It is obvious that Quakers in Britain Yearly Meeting now have a much wider variety of spiritual experience and belief than has been the case in the past. This variety is beginning to echo the variety  among Quakers worldwide, of which Friends in the UK have often remained unconscious. Different Quaker traditions, with their labels of Liberal, Evangelical, Conservative etc., have in the past led to splits and schisms and this can still happen. However if we can manage to remain open, to really listen to the hearts, lives and experience of other Friends as well as to their (often difficult) words, then variety can be embraced while we still retain our differences.

The variety of life experience encountered among Friends in Britain may be less evident. The vast majority of us are well educated, white, getting on in years, comfortably situated. This perceived lack of variety can be off-putting to those who feel themselves to be different from the status quo. Do Quakers as a group welcome 'people like us' while often unconsciously rejecting the 'awkward squad'? Even if we are insiders in some ways, do we stay silent about aspects of ourselves which might make others feel uncomfortable?

I became a Quaker because of what I found in Meeting for Worship and that experience, with all its variety, is still a sure foundation for my life and faith. From that foundation I have slowly learned to value the variety of people who I worship with. Living in community with Quakers in my local meeting, my area meeting, my Yearly Meeting and in other groups, both face to face and online, has been a valuable but often difficult path to tread. For me it has been about learning to listen to and learning to love a wide variety of sometimes inspiring, sometimes infuriating Friends. It is a continuing journey on which I sometimes take one step forward and two steps back but I know that it is worth my perseverance.

Quaker Alphabet Blog 2014 - A for Living Adventurously

Ron Waddams. Living adventurously

'Live adventurously' is a very popular Quaker slogan, one of those phrases which we often repeat without always thinking much about what they mean. The words are usually attributed to George Fox although I have not been able to track down a reference. Perhaps readers of this blog may be able to help me with this?

What is certain is that 'Live adventurously' are the first two words, in fact the first sentence, of paragraph 27 in Britain Yearly Meeting's Advices and Queries as approved in 1994. The whole paragraph reads,
 Live adventurously. When choices arise, do you take the way that offers the fullest opportunity for the use of your gifts in the service of God and the community? Let your life speak. When decisions have to be made, are you ready to join with others in seeking clearness, asking for God's guidance and offering counsel to one another?

Looked at in context we can see that the paragraph is about making choices and taking decisions and the best way to do that as Quakers. We are not necessarily asked to go out and have adventures but to live our daily lives with a sense of adventure, of being willing to go somewhere or do something new if that will help us make the fullest use of our gifts. The advice also stresses the need to live adventurously not just as individuals but in community, seeking clearness together. For me perhaps the  most important part of this advice is its insistence that this adventurous living is part of our response to the guidance of God, as this has been my experience.

Expressing this phrase in art Ron Waddams's 1994 painting Living Adventurously is full of colour, life and people.We do not have to set out on our adventure, whether it be spiritual, mental or physical, alone. We have our Quaker community and we also always have our Inward Teacher and Guide.

Quaker Alphabet Blog Week 41 - U for Unquakerly

I have a problem with the word 'unquakerly'. It derives from the word 'quakerly' or 'quakerlike' - looking or behaving like a Quaker - but what does a Quaker look like today and how does a Quaker behave? Does it hark back to Whittier's 'Quaker of the olden time' and is 'being quakerly' the same for everyone?

One of the things that makes me uncomfortable about the word 'unquakerly' is that it is always used as a criticism. The person using it assumes that they know what 'quakerly' is and what it is not. Over the years many different things have been called 'unquakerly' - violence, conflict or disagreement of any sort, anger - colourful clothes, make-up, jewellery - drinking, gambling - dancing, singing, learning to play an instrument - programmed worship, Quaker pastors - paying taxes, not paying taxes. The list is endless and endlessly contradictory.

Most Quakers try their best to follow their leadings, to be guided by their Inward Teacher and their community. This endeavour is helped by mutual encouragement, not by criticism and by being divided into 'quakerly' and 'unquakerly'. For me the use of the word 'unquakerly' about someone else is where our famous Quaker tolerance breaks down.

Of course each of us is aware of our own lapses and failings and we can use the word 'unquakerly' defensively against ourselves, jumping in to criticise ourselves before others can do it. But rather than being negative there is a debate to be had about those positive quakerly qualities that we have in common.
 
I have another blog dedicated to the crafty things I make and perhaps some of them are rather unquakerly. On the one hand I am recycling material and making things rather than buying them, but on the other hand my beading is very sparkly and over the top and I enjoy it so much! For myself I think that the word 'unquakerly' is a bit like the word 'feminist.' It makes me want to say "This is what an unquakerly Quaker looks like - let's explore what that means!"

Getting going again

As I said in my last post I've decided to set up another blog and have been spending time thinking about that. I've also been considering what to do with this blog and how to get myself writing here more regularly, which I have tried several times before.

On consideration I don't think that giving myself hurdles to clear, or more likely not to clear, is very helpful at the moment. When it comes to day to day thoughts I have a handwritten diary which serves me better and has done for years.

So I will write here when something happens that I want to write about in greater length or when I am looking for a reaction to help me onwards. I will also write a bit about my latest writing project - a biography of an 18th century Quaker travelling minister which I expect to be working on for several years to come.

As well as getting on with writing however I am also getting more involved with my meeting again. I fell into a long period of very irregular attendance when my mother was ill and even after she died I found it difficult to go back. It has taken me years to begin to reconnect with my local Quaker community and to go to meeting for worship regularly once more. Living in community has always been the part of Quakerism that I have found most difficult and have had to work at - but I know that I must [not should] do it.

My Inward Teacher has, as always, been gently but firmly pushing me onwards and made sure that a couple of weeks ago I went to a specially called meeting about nominations in our local meeting. Among other things I heard that all three of the clerking team were standing down and the committee had not been able to find replacements. Although it was not usual to ask for volunteers that was what they were doing. As I sat there I knew that I was going to have to put my name forward and it seems that another Friend was thinking the same thing. So I went home  and wrote an email and so did she and now we have both been appointed - as she said 'Now we've really done it!' We look forward to welcoming another member of the team and setting up more of a 'one off one on' continuity.

So now I am going to be much more a part of my meeting than I have been for a long time and hope that I - and they- will survive!